Daily Hand 22: The QE Bull, Taper Tantrums Included, May 2014 to May 2016

On August 2, 2026 everyone who opened the game got the same secret two years: May 15, 2014 to May 13, 2016, the QE bull, taper tantrums included. The couch bought on day one, never sold, and turned $10,000 into $11,284 (+12.8%). 69% of the players who tried beat it.

THE COUCH'S $10,000, DAY BY DAY, REAL DAILY DATA

What the couch did

ENDED WITH$11,284 (+12.8%)

WORST DRAWDOWN-13% by Feb 11, 2016

WORST SINGLE DAY-3.9% Aug 24, 2015

BEST SINGLE DAY+3.9% Aug 26, 2015

CASH INSTEAD (T-BILLS)+0.2%

The era

The QE bull, taper tantrums included. The US lost its AAA rating in August 2011, Europe wobbled, and in 2013 the Fed hinted at slowing its bond buying and markets threw a tantrum. The market kept climbing through all of it.

THE EXHIBIT: THE QE BULL, TAPER TANTRUMS INCLUDED. EVERYONE WHO PLAYED WAS THERE.

What the players did

BEAT THE COUCH68.8%

WITH CERTIFIED SKILL34.4%

BY LUCK34.4%

COUCH WINS21.9%

DEAD HEAT3.1%

ENLIGHTENED (TOUCHED NOTHING)6.2%

MEDIAN RESULT vs THE COUCH+1.6%

MEDIAN TRADES6

MEDIAN TIME IN MARKET67%

The read

A rare one: the market went up and the humans still won 69% of the time. The scares inside the window were deep enough that stepping aside paid. Only 34.4% did it well enough to pass the monkey audit.

Player figures count every official and replayed attempt at this exact hand filed on the day it was dealt, from the run export of October 31, 2026. A win counts as SKILL only if it beats 90% of 1,000 monkeys replaying the same window with the same trade count and the same time in the market. Across the whole ledger the couch wins 62% of 120,800 games.

Frequently asked

What was the Beat the Couch daily hand on August 2, 2026?

Day 22 dealt the two years from May 15, 2014 to May 13, 2016, the QE bull, taper tantrums included. A couch that bought on day one and never sold turned $10,000 into $11,284 (+12.8%).

How often did players beat the couch on day 22?

68.8% of the players who filed the hand beat the couch. 34.4% passed the 1,000-monkey skill audit; the rest of the winners were stamped LUCKY.

Can I still play the day 22 hand?

Yes. The past hand button deals the exact same window. It is filed as a replay: it does not touch your streak, the daily standings or the public ledger.

Day 22 · The QE Bull, Taper Tantrums Included