Daily Hand 109: From the QE Bull, Taper Tantrums Included into the Low-Volatility Melt-Up, Jan 2015 to Jan 2017

On October 28, 2026 everyone who opened the game got the same secret two years: January 13, 2015 to January 11, 2017, from the QE bull, taper tantrums included into the low-volatility melt-up. The couch bought on day one, never sold, and turned $10,000 into $11,689 (+16.9%). 57% of the players who tried beat it.

THE COUCH'S $10,000, DAY BY DAY, REAL DAILY DATA

What the couch did

ENDED WITH$11,689 (+16.9%)

WORST DRAWDOWN-13% by Feb 11, 2016

WORST SINGLE DAY-3.9% Aug 24, 2015

BEST SINGLE DAY+3.9% Aug 26, 2015

CASH INSTEAD (T-BILLS)+0.4%

The era

The QE bull, taper tantrums included. The US lost its AAA rating in August 2011, Europe wobbled, and in 2013 the Fed hinted at slowing its bond buying and markets threw a tantrum. The market kept climbing through all of it.

The low-volatility melt-up. The calmest stretch in decades. In 2017 the market never had a 3% pullback. There was nothing to dodge, so every day in cash was a day the couch got paid for sitting still.

THE EXHIBIT: FROM THE QE BULL, TAPER TANTRUMS INCLUDED INTO THE LOW-VOLATILITY MELT-UP. EVERYONE WHO PLAYED WAS THERE.

What the players did

BEAT THE COUCH57.1%

WITH CERTIFIED SKILL35.7%

BY LUCK21.4%

COUCH WINS28.6%

DEAD HEAT14.3%

ENLIGHTENED (TOUCHED NOTHING)0.0%

MEDIAN RESULT vs THE COUCH+0.5%

MEDIAN TRADES6

MEDIAN TIME IN MARKET68%

The read

A rare one: the market went up and the humans still won 57% of the time. The scares inside the window were deep enough that stepping aside paid. Only 35.7% did it well enough to pass the monkey audit.

Player figures count every official and replayed attempt at this exact hand filed on the day it was dealt, from the run export of October 31, 2026. A win counts as SKILL only if it beats 90% of 1,000 monkeys replaying the same window with the same trade count and the same time in the market. Across the whole ledger the couch wins 62% of 120,800 games.

Frequently asked

What was the Beat the Couch daily hand on October 28, 2026?

Day 109 dealt the two years from January 13, 2015 to January 11, 2017, from the QE bull, taper tantrums included into the low-volatility melt-up. A couch that bought on day one and never sold turned $10,000 into $11,689 (+16.9%).

How often did players beat the couch on day 109?

57.1% of the players who filed the hand beat the couch. 35.7% passed the 1,000-monkey skill audit; the rest of the winners were stamped LUCKY.

Can I still play the day 109 hand?

Yes. The past hand button deals the exact same window. It is filed as a replay: it does not touch your streak, the daily standings or the public ledger.

Day 109 · From the QE Bull, Taper Tantrums Included into the Low-Volatility Melt-Up